requiescat in pace

tatay nestor is finally free and threading the path laid by God for him. please have him in your prayers.

he suffered his 7th stroke on the 8th of March. he was declared brain-dead by then, but the family wanted to put him on respirator until everybody gets a chance to say goodbye to him.

morning of the 9th, i was already on board a plane on my way home to pinas. same with my 2 uncles from NY, and an aunt from Tokyo. on the afternoon of the 11th, everybody was by his bedside. first time since 1983. we were quiet for a moment, then it was chaos. everybody was joking, and laughing and poking at each other. that is probably how tatay would want to remember his family. amidst the merry reunion, tatay shed a tear.

on the 13th, all his children and apo said our final goodbyes. but he still survived one more day... onto the 14th, which is mommy letty's bday. morning of the 14th, we went to the hospital first, and mommy said her final goodbye to tatay, before we left to go to church. tito ebet said that right after we left, tatay's heart rate started to rise, an indication that his system was trying hard to keep everything functioning. 3pm that day, he took one deep breath, and peacefully slipped away.

he will be remembered as the jolly grandfather that everyone loved to tease. he himself is a joker. it was probably his genes that got carried to my uncles and cousins who can tease like there's no tomorrow. he's the family's protector, and hardworking provider. he's everybody's "kuya nestor". he was that grandfather who yelled at a nurse when she couldn't get an IV attached to me when I was a baby. he was that grandfather i kissed goodbye a year and a half ago, and who asked in return "saan ka pupunta?". he was that grandfather who asked me, over the phone, last Christmas "kelan ka babalik dito?".

i will always remember him for his laughter and his handsome face. and his dance. the last dance i saw him do was almost 2 years ago. we were hanging out at the street in front of our house in karapatan, him on his rocking chair, us on plastic monoblocks. he heard music and said proudly "magaling akong sumayaw!". we (his apos) challenged him to show us, and he gamely stood up with my brother's help, and he swayed his body side to side by his rocking chair. he's already half-paralyzed by then, and you can see him exert some effort to move his entire body in that simple sway.

that was the best dance performance i've seen in my life.